Today I revealed my struggle with Rheumatoid Arthritis with a roomful of people. It was rather accidental but I feel a little bit of relief since it happened. I’m noticing now how everyday tasks are becoming increasingly more challenging—especially at work. I write quite a bit at work and using a regular pen is very painful and sometimes not even possible when my joints are too swollen. A few weeks back I ordered a couple of Ergo Sof pens that allow me to write using the weight of my hand and slight movements rather than from gripping a pen with joints in my fingers. Having this pen has been a blessing for me and using it has become second nature.
This all-day workshop involved the painful task of extensive note-taking and long periods of sitting. Instinctively I grabbed my special writing tool and took notes.
About two hours into the training, we had a break, and a man at another table shouted out, “Is that a pen? It’s space-age. What is that?” I shared that it is indeed a pen. He asked how it works. Now I had a crowd peeking over my shoulder trying to get a glimpse of this odd pen. Way to stay under the radar, I thought to myself! I demonstrated how it worked and added that it lets me place the weight of my hand on the pen rather than on my joints so that if my joints are stiff and swollen from my arthritis, this pen makes it easier to write. I should have said possible to write. The response from the man who originated this demo was that he was older than me and he should have the pen for his hands but I’m too young for arthritis. I simply replied, “No, I’m not. You can actually be any age and have arthritis.” I got looks from him and everyone around as if I was talking nonsense. He just shrugged and giggled. Before I could say anything else, the break was over and we were back in session.
I spent the next few minutes thinking about that moment and realizing that a lot of people I work with now know I have arthritis. Then I decided that this is my life. This is not something to hide or be embarrassed about. This is more than a story about sharing about a pen. It marked the moment in time that I started caring more about what others weren’t thinking about arthritis and I decided bring it out in the open.